Responsibility and the Pill

It’s claimed by those standing against contraception that advocates of birth control promote irresponsibility. The fact is, it’s the other way around.

Let’s not even discuss unmarried sex. While there is absolutely nothing wrong with that, speaking of it just muddies the waters. And let's not bring into the debate the fact that many women use the Pill to help with medical conditions such as endometriosis. For the sake of the point, let’s keep the discussion to the bonds of holy matrimony. A young couple gets married, perhaps with dreams of one day starting a family but wanting to spend a few years becoming acquainted with their union. Making it strong physically, financially and emotionally. Even antiquated religious institutions recognize the fact that the act of sex can strengthen the relationship between husband and wife. But if this couple were to partake in it without contraception they run the risk of having children they’re not prepared for. Certainly, there are other forms of control. Prophylactics. The rhythm method. But let’s be honest: The Pill makes it a lot easier.

So essentially, the anticontraception crowd is offering this couple two options: Stay celibate for the amount of time you want to work on strengthening your union or procreate irresponsibly. Run the risk of popping the children out whether they’re prepared for them or not. What a sinful thing to preach.

To this crowd preaching irresponsibility, even if a couple is married, to have sex without the possibility of procreation is a sin. Which instantly damns a good portion of marriages because one or both partners are infertile. Woman past the age of menopause should no longer yearn for the closeness so put the Viagra  away you old codgers. Unless you want a younger wife who can provide fertile ground in which to sow your seed. And of course ditching the old wife is a sin, unless the Pope grants special dispensation.

And perhaps the couple is the sort who feels that it’s better to stop at two or three children so that they can afford to raise them above the poverty line. Perhaps send them to good schools so the children could have better futures. Au contraire. The morality brigade insists that those who want to be close as couples have to run the risk of having more kids than they may not be able to afford. Run the risk of putting more and dangerous stress on a woman’s aging body. Run the risk of damage to the baby. All because, according to some, contraception is a sin in the eyes of God. A god that the couple may not even believe in.

Now I’ve concentrated on those writhing in the bonds of matrimony to show just how sick the mentality of these anticontraceptionites is. Even two people in a legal, sanctified union have to choose between the physical expression of their love or popping out litters of children that they may not be able to care for.

Which is why I say, those preaching this attitude are preaching the height of irresponsibility.

But let’s back away from those who marry and remember just for a moment that we live in a country where there’s a separation of church and state (and Catholics, you’d better be glad we do since there was a time in the beginning of this country where you could have been hung for stepping foot into a Protestant town).

The holy books of the Bible, retold, rewritten, copied, edited over the centuries say many things about many things. Some of the "wisdom" is stolen from other cultures, some is contradiction, some pretty questionable morally as well. It may be one person’s moral law, but it is not the law of this land. A person having sex, married or not, has no bearing upon the lives of other people unless said person is careless enough to produce a child that she or he can’t afford and expects the tax prayer to do so. But that’s done all the time by married people whose careless procreation harms society.

So in essence, who is the more irresponsible here? The person married or single who want to have sex and takes steps (uses contraception) to avoid unwanted procreation; or the institutions who insist that contraception is a sin and instead encourage people to produce children they’re not ready for who will be a drain on society.

Perhaps irresponsibility, like morality, is in the eye of the beholder. But those who labor under the misguided and extremist notion the contraception is a sin have a lot to learn when it comes to the concept of responsibility.